Oh frick.
Frickidy frickidy frick.
It's snowing.
Snow, people. You know what snow is around here?? It is swirling cocaine that falls from the sky. I call it that because whenever it starts in Wisconsin, its like all the assholes out on the road get "high" and forget how to drive. EVERY YEAR. Without fail. I can set my watch to it. People who live here their entire lives and still forget how to drive in winter. Its like they see a flake and that activates the automatic swerving mechanism in their brains. OH SHIT OH SHIT! DODGE THE FRICKING SNOWFLAKES!
Are you KIDDING me?!?
Can I be outraged?? Damn right! It took my ten minutes to go four miles because the road is wet. It's not below 35 outside- so everything is melting, nothing is sticking, but grandma in front of me is going to have a heart attack before she gets to wherever the hell she is going. My guess is Florida. Fuck this snow, she is OUTTA here. Go granny go.
Hubby's parents are taking us out tonight for birthday dinner. I get to pick where we go. Woot. Honestly, I am feeling REALLY pouty today. Can't tell you why. My mom says its hormones. I told her the ground isn't frozen yet- I can still bury her.
I am a little jealous though, I will admit it... My OTHER sister in law's shower is the 29th of November, and she isn't due until the week after me... but me? I get my shower less than four weeks before I am due. That is a major downer to me. Now I am concerned and stressed about getting thank yous done and having gifts washed and put away. I am slow and lazy, and it is hard to keep up that image when I actually have to get in gear and DO stuff... trust me, doing stuff is overrated. Give me a bag of chips and set me in front of the tele during a House marathon.
Hugh Laurie....guuuuurgle....
Kristi Rufener
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hahahahahaha!!
ReplyDeleteI have so much to say about this post. The ground isn't frozen had me rolling! Why do people feel they have to point out that there are hormones running rampant in the pregnant woman's body? Hello, stating the obvious and risking their life. Why?
I hear you on the family member that you love to hate. I have three total and I avoid them at all costs.
I am with you on the four week thing. I would want at least 8 to get everything done. Of course, there isn't really a tactful way to say, "We need to bump this shit up cuz it'll interfere with my rigorous television and farting schedule."
lol hear in upstate NY it is the same. 1st sign of snow , everyone turns into idiots !!
ReplyDeleteOk well I see you're in a bad mood for this one!
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way...the next person to tell me I'm an emotional train wreck because of hormones I'm going to deck!! Why can't I just be an emotional train wreck! I'll show them when I am exactly the same after this baby comes! Oh but then it will be Post Partum stuff right!!! Seems like its a no win situation!